JOKES !

MAKING BABIES

Dad came home one day in an exceptionally horny mood and took his wife upstairs for sex. Just when they were really getting into it, their young son entered the room and started to cry. "What's wrong, son?" the father asked. "Why are you crying?" "You're hurting my mommy," the little boy replied. "No, no," the father reassured. "I'm not hurting her. We are making babies." This seemed to calm the boy, and when he left the room the couple went back to their business. The next day the father came home from work and found his son on the steps, crying. "What's the matter NOW?" asked Dad. "It's those babies you were making with Mommy yesterday," the boy answered. "The mailman is upstairs eating them!"

THE PENIS TATOO

A guy gets home late one night and his wife says: "Where have you been?""I was out getting a tattoo.""A tattoo? What kind of tattoo did you get?""I got a hundred dollar bill on my penis.""What the hell were you thinking? Why did you get a hundred dollar bill on your penis?""Well, number one, I like to watch my money grow. number two, once in a while, I like to play with my money. And lastly, instead of you going out shopping, you can stay right here at home and blow a hundred bucksanytime you want!"